


memories like water

by eenimeeniminimo



Series: ghostbur drabbles [2]
Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Amnesia, Angst with a Happy Ending, Cold, DreamSMP - Freeform, Ghost Wilbur - Freeform, Hurt/Comfort, Memories, l'manberg, no beta we die like men, your tears feed my soul
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-20
Updated: 2020-11-20
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:41:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27649031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eenimeeniminimo/pseuds/eenimeeniminimo
Summary: wilbur has a book and in this book he has written all that he can remember. he is determined to remember all that it contains and never forget what he did, and never forget who he loved, and never forget what is was all for.but sometimes even the strongest of minds can't fight against the soul(ghost wilbur begins to forget his own memories)
Relationships: No Romantic Relationship(s)
Series: ghostbur drabbles [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2029960
Comments: 7
Kudos: 148





	memories like water

**Author's Note:**

> if any of the creators express that they are uncomfortable with fanfiction this will be taken down immediately.
> 
> contains themes of memory loss so if you're sensitive about that please be careful
> 
> enjoy!

_"the smell of bread"_  
_"l'manberg"_  
_"the revolution"_

wilburs hands carefully traced over the surely written words, each letter conjuring up a different memory

____"___ bullying tommy (he's a child)"_  
_"sparring with techno as a kid"_  
_"the wind"_

it was part of his daily routine at this point

_______"______ the wind"_  
_"being president"_  
_"people cheering for me"_

these were memories that he refused to forget, he refused to let go. without them, his hand faltered, without them he was nothing

__________"_________ Fundy growing up"_  
_"niki"_  
_"the van"_

____________.  
.  
._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

and so for the next month that's what he did.

every day he sat for a good hour delicately tracing over every word until there were grooves in the paper. it usually went without a hitch but today it was like his mind was full of lead.

"tubbo building everything... tubbo - tub?" wilbur thumped himself on the head a few times the name seemed so familiar but he couldn't put his mind on it.

"come on, come on" he muttered anxiously, "you know tubbo, tubbo, you know it I know you do, please please please" he tugged at his hair and he could feel his eyes welling up with salty tears.

"wilbur? are you alright?" a concerned voice called out for him. it sounded, familiar.

wilbur looked up and standing at the door was a small brown haired boy. his brown eyes were glittering with worry as he looked at wilbur.

"wilbur?" he asked and stepped forward. on instinct wilbur took a step back.

"w-who are you?"

the boys steps faltered and his brow furrowed. he looked up at wilbur and tilted his head

"is this some kind of practical joke wilbur? it's me, tubbo?"

and then it crashed back to wilbur all at once. Tommy's right hand man, his spy, his man on the inside, a suit- schlatt- president- l'manberg. wilbur stood in shock. he'd- he'd forgotten it. for all of his planning and preparation he'd forgotten-

he'd forgotten tubbo.

dropping the book he was holding wilbur fled. faintly he could hear a voice calling after him but his ears were filled with white noise. he ran and he ran until he spotted a familiar figure.

"techno" he cried out in a broken voice. his brother turned and looked at him, a half smile on his face.

"hey wilbur-" technos eyes roamed over wilburs tearful face and his smile fell into a frown, "what happened wil?"

but wilbur couldn't answer, he couldn't stop shaking, his hands coming to clutch at his sides and sobs racking his body. he shook his head.

"i couldnt- i couldn't"

techno cautiously walked closer to his brother and distantly wilbur could feel hesitant arms coming to wrap around him.

"it's okay wilbur, it's okay" a deep voice said, laced with concern.

all wilbur could do was cry.

.  
.  
.

once it started it was like a snowball in motion. it started small, forgetting names and places but soon it grew to forgetting the presence of whole people in his life.

wilbur couldn't forget the betrayed expression on the weird fox man's face when wilbur said he couldn't remember him. wilbur didn't understand why he was so upset but when he tried to ask his dad, phil simply shook his head and looked away.

wilbur didn't understand why everyone seemed so upset these days. he was very happy!

on the upside everyone seemed really nice to him. there was this one really pretty baker girl who always gave him sweet treats. he always made sure to be super nice to her, her smiles were so full of sorrow.

most days wilbur spent around the town (he couldn't remember the name - it wasn't important) he felt very safe and happy - even if sometimes he couldn't help but look at the outskirts of the town and feel like something was missing.

he didn't think too hard on it.

.  
.  
.

"dad" wilbur looked up at his father with wide eyes, "it says here in the book 'philza stabbing me to death with a sword' but you - you wouldn't do that, would you dad?"

his dad looked down at him and then looked up, eyes bright blue as they reflected the clear sky. for some reason his dad's voice sounded tight and choked when he responded

"of course not wil, you're always safe with me"

wilbur hummed happily and leaned into his dad's, content with tracing the meaningless words of this book.

.  
.  
.

the ghost was sure he once had a purpose. once he was sure he had a presence.

he no longer bothered to show himself and he thought that he'd left the memories of those who lived here, although they still visited his stone (it said wilbur, wilbur... was that his name?)

he loved watching them going about their lives, even if he didn't understand why he loved that. he watched as the town grew into a city and city into a nation.

he watched as these people grew, their minds turning slower and bodies growing older.

he watched as they buried the first of their own.

the stone was right next to his

"philza, a great father, leader and fighter" it said. he liked sitting on the stone, it was the perfect place to watch the clouds go by.

it was only when their last went to the ground, surrounded by loves ones and gentle warmth that he began to feel strange, like he didn't belong here.

he could almost here someone calling out to him

"wilbur, wilbur, wilbur"

every day the voice grew louder and louder, a persistent itch in his head.

one day it felt so loud his head felt like it was splitting in two. it hurt. it hurt so much and he just wanted it to stop.

it was so cold now and the voice was so warm and comforting and friendly. he could barely feel any fight in himself. what was he staying around for? he didn't know he hadn't for awhile.

he went over and sat on his stone and stared up. up and huge expanse of stars, slightly dimmed by the light on the city next to him. closing his eyes he could something warm enveloping him - like a hug from a friend or a large warm blanket.

and this time, he just gave in.

.  
.  
.

when wilbur opened his eyes it was like seeing with glasses on for the first time in... he didn't even know how long. for a short while he just stopped and let the feeling of a clear mind overtake him.

looking around he noticed some very familiar faces and a bolt of joy struck through him as he realised he could recognise each and every one of them.

as his memories came flooding back wilbur could do little else then let out a choked sob and fall into the soft grass below. as he revealed in the feeling of sanity he saw in his peripheral and hand reaching out to him.

following the arm up wilbur could see bright blue eyes staring back at him.

"wilbur, you're finally here! you took your time coming up big man!"

wilbur took his hand, tears still dripping down his face.

he did it.

he was home.

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by @/nilnisi_ on twitter
> 
> amnesia wilbur and ghost wilbur are canon. only pain lies ahead


End file.
